THE COURAGE TO BE DISLIKED - ΤΟΛΜΗΣΕ ΝΑ ΕΙΣΑΙ Ο ΕΑΥΤΟΣ ΣΟΥ
This is a book , the book that i read for the month of February , every month i read two books . This book is special , i ve read it and its good .
A philosopher talks with a young man about the problems and many other aspects about life .
The young man is talking and asking questions about matters in life we think we know .
He talks about happiness , acceptance , courage and to be who you are .
Καλησπέρα φίλοι μου το σημερινό ποστ έχει σχέση με το βιβλίο που διάβασα το Φεβρουάριο . Είναι ενα πολύ καλό βιβλίο , το προτείνω ανεπιφύλαχτα , απο κάτω θα σας αφήσω κάποια απο τα αγαπημένα μου κομμάτια του βιβλίου απλά επειδή ειναι πιο εύκολο να κατανοήσεις το νόημα τους απο τα αγγλικά . Το βιβλίο υπάρχει και στα ελληνικά προτείνω ανεπιφύλαχτα να το διαβάσετε .
Φιλιά απο μενα ,
Ρ.
“Your unhappiness cannot be blamed on your past or your environment. And it isn’t that you lack competence. You just lack courage. One might say you are lacking in the courage to be happy.”
― The Courage To Be Disliked: How to free yourself, change your life and achieve real happiness
In this blog post i will share with you some of my favourite quotes from this book that I really really loved. And of course I recommend this book to read it is amazing!!
If one really has a feeling of contribution, one will no longer have any need for recognition from others. Because one will already have the real awareness that “I am of use to someone,” without needing to go out of one’s way to be acknowledged by others. In other words, a person who is obsessed with the desire for recognition does not have any community feeling yet, and has not managed to engage in self-acceptance, confidence in others, or contribution to others.
I have a young friend who dreams of becoming a novelist, but he never seems to be able to complete his work. According to him, his job keeps him too busy, and he can never find enough time to write novels, and that's why he can't complete work and enter it for writing awards. But is that the real reason? No! It's actually that he wants to leave the possibility of "I can do it if I try" open, by not committing to anything. He doesn't want to expose his work to criticism, and he certainly doesn't want to face the reality that he might produce an inferior piece of writing and face rejection. He wants to live inside that realm of possibilities, where he can say that he could do it if he only had the time, or that he could write if he just had the proper environment, and that he really does have the talent for it. In another five or ten years, he will probably start using another excuses like "I'm not young anymore" or "I've got a family to think about now
A healthy feeling of inferiority is not something that comes from comparing oneself to others; it comes from one’s comparison with one’s ideal self.
The courage to be happy also includes the courage to be disliked. When you have gained that courage, your interpersonal relationships will all at once change into things of lightness.
We cannot alter objective facts. But subjective interpretations can be altered as much as one likes. And we are inhabitants of a subjective world.
It’s that you are disliked by someone. It is proof that you are exercising your freedom and living in freedom, and a sign that you are living in accordance with your own principles.
No experience is in itself a cause of our success or failure. We do not suffer from the shock of our experiences—the so-called trauma—but instead we make out of them whatever suits our purposes. We are not determined by our experiences, but the meaning we give them is self-determining.
Why is it that people seek recognition from others? In many cases, it is due to the influence of reward-and-punishment education.
If one really has confidence in oneself, one doesn’t feel the need to boast. It’s because one’s feeling of inferiority is strong that one boasts. One feels the need to flaunt one’s superiority all the more. There’s the fear that if one doesn’t do that, not a single person will accept one “the way I am.” This is a full-blown superiority complex.
Unless one is unconcerned by other people’s judgments, has no fear of being disliked by other people, and pays the cost that one might never be recognized, one will never be able to follow through in one’s own way of living. That is to say, one will not be able to be free.
A way of living in which one is constantly troubled by how one is seen by others is a self-centered lifestyle in which one’s sole concern is with the “I.
Three things are needed at this point: “self-acceptance,” “confidence in others,” and “contribution to others.
Ah, but you are wrong. Those who go so far as to boast about things out loud actually have no confidence in themselves. As Adler clearly indicates, “The one who boasts does so only out of a feeling of inferiority.
One has to stand on one’s own two feet, and take one’s own steps forward with the tasks of interpersonal relations. One needs to think not, What will this person give me? but rather, What can I give to this person? That is commitment to the community.
The person who assumes a boasting manner when talking about his upbringing and the like, the various misfortunes that have rained down upon him. If someone should try to comfort this person, or suggest some change be made, he’ll refuse the helping hand by saying, “You don’t understand how I feel.
Your life is not something that someone gives you, but something you choose yourself, and you are the one who decides how you live.
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*i dont own any of the pictures
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